Tarzan VS a Leopard

OK Tarzan you're a spaz.

This fight would actually be really close, if Tarzan could avoid the sharp things. Yes Tarzan has been raised by gorillas and yes he has weird natural strength long developed by surfing on tree branches and climbing around on rocks. His strength is truly amazing and he can grab stuff with his feet...on the other hand the Leopard (some say it was a Jaguar, but I'm going with a Leopard) is a BIG CAT! Behind his fuzzy face and long whiskers are a pair of canines you don't wanna hear bark. Tarzan would have to keep the Leopard's teeth and claws under control and somehow be able to counter the cat's stealth-like agility with his own; this would not be that hard since Tarzan could match the cat's agility, maybe even one up it, because of his strength and training. Tarzan can swing from vines, can a Leopard? No. I'm not allowing Tarzan the use of any tools either, shame I know.

The Leopard would leap at Tarzan who would then try to throw the Leopard to the ground and get behind it. Tarzan isn't strong enough to keep the Leopard in his grips and the Leopard escapes. The Leopard, having far more stamina than Tarzan would wear Tarzan down. The relentless attacks with his sharp claws while Tarzan's feeble attempts to get a hold of the Leopards limbs and rip them off fall short. Even if Tarzan was defending Rosie O'Donald, the only way I see him winning is if he gets behind and on-top-of the Leopard and chokes it out or rips its throat out... but the Leopard ends up crushing Tarzan's larynx after severing almost all of his major arteries and veins. A bloody and exhausted Tarzan falls to the deck and the Leopard drags him back to his house and feeds Latrell Sprewell's kids. How's it taste Disney.

Silver Back Gorilla VS. the King of the Jungle

OK Lion, time to prove you deserve that crown.

It's fight night - now, the Lion has basically two options, since he has no opposable thumbs, he can either attempt to bight the Gorilla or bash him with one of his ferocious paws possibly inflicting some serious damage with his claws. If the Lion did try to bight the Gorilla and if he actually managed to get his teeth around something he better pray that he got the Gorilla's throat because if not then it is game over. As soon as the alleged King of the Jungle gets close enough the Gorilla would grab the Lion like a child, rip it free of it's toothy grip, and smash it into the earth! The Gorilla is so strong and the wide range of motion provided by his humanistic limbs makes this for quick KO if not a blatant maiming. Even if the mighty Gorilla didn't kill the Lion when he crushed his body he could still hold him down with one arm and bight the Lion with his powerful jaws delivering the fatal wounds.

Now I don't want to short change the Lion, he is a powerful beast and definitely a formidable foe for most other animals...but having the limited motion joints and being a quadruped with no thumbs really sets this guy back when facing the Gorilla. Even if the Lion charged the Gorilla full speed the Gorilla would still be able to take the hit, recover, and smash. Wouldn't even be hard. I actually laughed out loud when I considered the Lion having a chance. So shut your mouth Chris Gardner Will Smith, Silver Back is king.